Change of plan!

Change of plan... Decided to print one of the images and print it large A1. I've chosen a very fashiony (?!) image that has that fashion, vulnerable, glamourous feel as it relates to the social visual media I'm questioning but obviously the tights are slightly masking the face... I'm a bit nervous about showing it as its not my usual work, it feels risky just showing one image and I am worried that maybe it's too 'fashion' and too 'beautiful' but I think it's good that I take a risk and test out a new idea and a new way of working. Showing one still image means the viewer has to work harder unlike showing the video of performance that gives the viewer all. I wait to see how the exhibition goes. Really looking forward to seeing others work too, in tutor group it sounded like a lot of exciting work being made.

Working on images about female identity, how we wear masks, to be socially acceptable, to conform. Women are under pressure to be feminine, to be sexually attractive. Im working on taking away my identity as a woman in these images, to hide my body, hide my face but still be visable as a woman. I have a series of these images that i am going to exhibit in the stage one show next week. They will be printed just slightly smaller than life size and be framed, the 3 images will be on the floor, propped up against the wall. The frame is important as im talking about being trapped and the being on the floor is so i am almost not seen by the viewer, they may just walk past, missing me...i am insignificant.

Upcoming exhibition nerves

1st year exhibition coming up in week... Have to decide what I'm going to put in, I dont see any of my pieces as 'finished', I'm working through performance, photography and stitch toward a piece, my work is a series of questions I think and it's all documentation of the process, kind of like a living sketchbook. I need to therefore challenge myself to show something that I see as unfinished and maybe not 'my usual' work ( a video documentation of performance), but then again I like some of the performance pieces I've been working on. Hmm, I have a week to decide, im sure I will change my mind again and again!

Femininity and objectification

I have just finished my essay, i chose the discussion on John Bergers statement about men look at women, women look at themselves. I looked at the work of Cindy Sherman, Jo Spence and Francessca Woodman for challenging Bergers notion and to John Currin who reflects the notion. I am in my own practice looking for ways to challenge the notion of objectifying the woman, looking at femininity. I've been obscuring and distorting the face, using humour and by being 'feminine'!!!???

Work in progress

Stitch cam

I've been sketching in stitch (sewing) and decided to film myself sewing. Sewing, especially embroidering has always been a very much female past time and is of interest to me and this question around 'womens work', gender roles I suppose, female identity? I used my webcam and decided to film without my face in view, to focus on my hands stitching. When I watched the film back I had to laugh, as centre stage to the film seemed not so much the sewing but my breasts, it kinda looked like some strange fetish website for 'sewing fetishists', I rather like it and will explore it some more!

Theory bloody theory

I'm struggling with the theory side of the course, my dyslexia is challenging and I've not found enough texts that I can easily read. my attention span in lectures is not much more than 15 minutes then come in and out after that, it's frustrating not understanding a lot of the language used. I need suggestions of text that is more geared up to dyslexia learners...And hope for more visuals in lectures.

Drawing on stitch!

Stitch has made a reapearance in my practice in the form of drawing, I'm seeing a softer side, a less self punishing side to my work but struggle with the feeling of it being less powerful as a piece, but ive taken on board the suggestion that I need to push it forward. I'm thinking that my passion for clothes which was part of my previous career as a fashion stylist needs to find a place in my practice too. Need a trip to the Victoria and Albert, want to visit the fashion collection that I've visited since I was About 7 years old, plus I want to look to see if I can find some old needlework, old samplers I'm thinking!

Question????

In my performances I am experimenting/questioning weather I need to be present, can I use other people, do they need to be female or can I use male, is my work just about the female? Is my work with others, weather it be another performing or the viewer, about power, control, am I in control or them?

Marina Abramović

Went to the Lisson gallery to see Marina Abramović. Her first solo show in the UK. Old and new works. An obvious shift in her current work from earlier works. today's work is subtle, sensitive, less shocking, but all the same powerful. Her earlier works, performances shown in the form of photograph and video. I find her work very punishing but have respect and interest in her indurance and commitment. She really challenges herself and the viewer. I find the photographic record of the performances interesting as I can't get the complete feel of the performance and if there were no text explaining the performance I would most likely just see them as poor photographs ( but I actually have an interest in photography that isn't 'correct' or techniqally 'good'). I rather like not seeing all the performance, I personally think a photograph can be a performance, even in her current work, the large photos show a snap second in time where I see Marina as performing. I'm interesting in exploring this idea of photograph as performance.